I'm too young for this

This is for the me that's afraid of failure. Afraid my friends will pity me to see where I go in life. This is for the me that hasn't talked to my mom about college because I'm afraid she'll tell me I can't go because there's no way we can pay for it. 

I don't even know if I want to go to college. 

I have to go to college, don't I?

Otherwise I'll be a disappointment. 

Right?

This is for the me that's scared to leave my mom alone with my brothers. Who knows I should get another job and give her some of the money.

This is for the me that tries to impress you every day and tries to make my life seem like it's put together. Who lies to you by saying that I'm going to all my classes. 

Who cries sometimes because I can't seem to stop fucking things up.

Who scares you because I'm acting so different with those happy little pills.